Dearest readers, allow me to express my truest, most humble apologies for the war of words you have no doubt witnessed between the neighboring territories of Grabass_Champion’s Corner and my own loyal Corner. The fighting was long and intense, and in this war of attrition, there could be no winner. It was as if we were bystanders in Alien vs. Predator or participating in the Special Olympics: no matter who wins, we’re still losers. Also, both are stupid and so is he.
I am hoping to reclaim the moral high ground by offering Grabass_Champion the Oliver brunch. This way, one of two things can happen: he can accept it, and we can resume being mutual friends with respect for each other as fellow human beings… or he can reject it, and then all the remaining blood to be shed will be ON HIS SHOULDERS.
Or his HANDS.
Which are CONNECTED TO HIS SHOULDERS.
The ball is in your court, Grabass_Champion… but know this. If you pick it up and hurl it back at me, and I catch it, you have to spend the rest of the Gym period picking your nose on the sidelines.
And let it be known that I have always been a proponent of peace.
