Point: Sin
Sin, sin, sin. That’s all the atheists think of, and they even do it at least three times like I typed it. Atheists have been proven scientifically to be less moral than Christians (Source: Conservapedia), less charitable than Christians (Source: The Internet), and, fortunately, less politically-influential than Christians (Source: The Bible). They are a part of a massive conspiracy by the Gay Nazi Papist Commies to undermine our well-documented morality for ulterior motives we are far too busy to actually explain. We need to take this opportunity to crucify the little guy, since those .4% of Americans are a real threat to our highly-influential institutions and way of life!
Counterpoint: Cosin
Oh, blast. I was going to argue with you but you actually hit the metaphorical nail on the head, thus nailing my metaphorical hands to the metaphorical cross. But I’m afraid your victory is not just metaphorical but also pyrrhic, since you are far too late to stop us and our evil plan. Yes, that plan, the one we have launched into for motives too obvious to get into right now.
While you writhe helpless in the torture chair, Mr. Bond, let me congratulate you on identifying most of our henchmen, though you forgot our propagandists, the Liberal Media Jews from New York and their second chapter in Hollywood. How do you like the torture chair, Mr. Bond? We built it out of the souls of Christian babies that we sacrifice in our Satanist ceremonies. You are being tortured on the tortured. Who has control of the wordplay game now, bitch?
No, you are too late, you cannot stop us. We will shortly take over the world by letting gays raise kids to sell to Satan for sex across state lines. Then the last vestiges of your well-entrenched religion will be very plausibly swept away by us few atheists by relocating you into camps where you will be forced to read Harry Potter. It is true, as you point out: Harry Potter can only lead to the gulags, and history always repeats itself. This plan will work flawlessly for what are, again, obvious reasons.
