Having gleaned the secrets of great marketing from the best of them, I decided to make and market a few products of my own! Like JML and Carol Wright, I targeted stupid and lazy people.
THE TURBO DUMPER
You’ve never dumped faster than this! With patented CompostCombustion® technology, your own all-natural fecal material powers a scooter specially designed for those with mobility problems! Great for those who can never get to the bathroom in time.
MACH INFINITY DELUXE DILDO BRACE
Straps on around your butt and spine and braces them in a comfortable sitting position! Ideal for “massages”! Comes with 89 self-replicating blades that are guaranteed to slice off your enlarged penis or your money back! This special cream plugs into an ordinary wall socket and instantly rewires your scrotum using all-natural 21st –century technology!
Ahhh, that felt good. If there’s one thing I learned with this pair of reviews, it’s that a fool and his money are soon parted, but that fool will never let go of his penis pump cause his girlfriend’s clit won’t repel pests.