The following spam messages were all copied directly from my inbox at EA (where I’m currently working). They are presented here unaltered and unedited, except for a few instances in which potentially dangerous urls have been removed, and a few other instances in which I have inserted my own comments in brackets and italics [like this]:
From: Claude Caddle
Subject: Proof is nice to you
High-quality pharmacy quality to your country!!!
Holiday specials for the your size and health!!!
Come visit us online and see for your car!!! [Damn! So close to being a real, meaningful sentence this time, and they blew it!]
Acceptionally for free prices here!!!
From: Diekman Dudman
God dag, [We're off to a great start here]
The virus has been detected.
We notify you that the virus has been removed from this email.
Hohe hoholulu [I like to think this is supposed to be some sort of gleeful laughter]
He had been deceived by lady dashfort. Both the bhagena is
explained by nilakantha as swargaisysaryena. Young ladies
on either side formed a sort of battalion, her delight with
difficulty. To invite a french south carolina offered a
reward of fifteen hundred damnation! And so had ended that
memorable day sword, the mace, and the standard of thy son.
now (with a laugh) here you are! There was a hearty saying,so
be it,mounted on his car, and striking off their land, and
say they will allow themselves down at a minute object by
the side of the road, use in any circumstance whatever.
oddly enough, two men took their places twenty yards apart.
the family of her husband by bringing forth offspring. You
jolly well can’t, my dusky othello. But aren’t.
From:Two Geeks and A Robot [Boy, do these guys know me or what?]
Subject: Two Geeks are getting RICH with a ROBOT
May 2nd, 2008 Press Release:
Two geeks have created a ROBOT named MARL that has made them hundreds of thousands
of dollars, and they claim that their ROBOT is not Illegal.
Press here to read the full story while you can: [url removed]
Subject: Feel the radiance of these posh items
To: Augustus Vaughan [???]
target “regularof up to 5 gigabytes. Which the Internet Society of New
Stylishness and quality of our copied designer timepieces will meet your demands!
Our store is waiting for you! [url removed]
the leaders and deputy leaders of the DUP and SinnThe People’s Republic of
Chinaprocess. All must now take responsibility in governmentFurther, “These
Subject: Get worth any girl’s attention
From: Rebecca Barlow
To: Louise Boyle [again... ???]
Advance your masculine capabilities today!
Friday, March 23, 2007rO4HL4kxuLF5
and audiotapes is an accumulation of over than 1,600856
Friday, March 23, 2007gfCJJGmgPywOq0
6jP8gylXShNeZi2QzxV0l4kj0kMass wedding held against racism in
7577felt that some left with a pile of unanswered7711party Vlaams Belang, Van
Bellingen told : “It’s true
Friday, March 23, 2007EQXUNI6Yta0OS
7ikmNVgEF8kfrV27fUnRLByatGcMass wedding held against racism in