As H.L. Mencken once said, “Nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American people.”
I partly blame the excessive, ridiculous primary campaign, but this year’s election season has been too close, too long, and too dire for me to bear. I spend far too much time reading, thinking, and writing about it. And the race is close because people are too stupid or ignorant or apathetic to give a shit about it. What an insult to people like me who actually think about things.
Low-information voters are responsible for every problem this country has ever had. They are responsible for why negative ads work, for why flip-flopping and pandering work. If we don’t hold politicians accountable, then they’re not. If we don’t fact-check, why shouldn’t they lie? We reap what we sow.
Frankly, we deserve the last 8 years of George W. Failure, and who knows? Maybe we deserve 4 more years of nonsensical policies, disorganized spaghetti-at-the-wall idiocy, secrecy, and lies. Even if Obama actually was somehow an elitist, racist, sexist terrorist I would vote for him, given that choice. At least the terrorists are consistent. At least we know what they stand for.
Low-information voters are also to blame for every asinine position held by a politician. Few people in Congress are simply stupid. But many were sent there by stupid people. If enough people believe something, however dumb it may be, they’ll find a politician who’ll rally to that cause. Irrelevant offshore drilling? Drill, baby, drill! Let’s see if there’s oil in my shoe!
And low-information voters are the reason this election is close. Terrorist fist jabs. Lipstick on pigs. Tax-and-spend Democrats. If these (imaginary) things are the reason we experience another great depression, then I will be unable to restrain my anger and probably start breaking the windows of cars with Republican stickers on them. SOCIETY MADE ME DO IT.
For me, this thing has been fever-pitch since January. A whole year of misery and high blood pressure. A whole year of working, of thinking, of writing. As one poster said on MSNBC, “It feels like Clinton, Obama, and McCain have all been President two years now.” That’s what it’s like for those of us who actually understand the race. We’re dealing with three (or four, if you count that other miserable failure) Presidents at once. And it’s more than I can take.
So, to all low-information voters, to all non-voters, and apathetic people: start caring now, or I will have to kill you before high blood pressure kills me.
You bunch of secret Muslims.