|
||||||||||||||
|
Roger Roger was probably the most unfortunate of targets of Ronnie’s e-mails. Her e-mails to Roger were the most frequent and the least comprehensible, and they all addressed practical matters, so he had to actually translate them from “idiot” to English and then act on them. Combine this with the fact that Roger has less tolerance for stupidity than most in our company, and you got a very bad work relationship.
Having lived with my girlfriend-at-the-time for two and a half years, I came to take some of her possessions for granted. Then, one inappropriately bright and shining summer day, all of that stuff left my home and traveled to her new one, far away. Most of those possessions I was actually happier without, because most of it was stuff for which I had no use and for which we had no space to actually store. One among those things, though, was sorely missed after it was gone: The vacuum cleaner.
This image of a cheery but bizarrely-clothed Russian tourist appeared in Burpen’s Samba article a few months back. Although not as repulsive as the infamous awkward.jpg, the only thing stopping us from photoshopping him into strange situations months ago was our lack of time. But now, with finals looming for the students among us, excuses not to work are treasured. And so I bring you: the Lurid Life of Lyurej.
I just got back from my 8th tour of duty. After the 3rd, they stop giving you tour guides.
Chicago is busy constructing a school for the victims of bullying. That’s great—they should build more schools like this, for my amusement. Because you see, in every social circle imaginable, someone will be picked on. I have fun imagining the guy who’s a big enough loser to get picked on at THIS school. You can win any raffle by carrying a raffle spool with you everywhere. But it might get suspicious when you win everything. And also the cost of the spool might be as much as anything you might win with it. So, upon closer examination, this idea simultaneously sucks and kicks ass.
1. List of Cheap and Useful College Textbooks 2. List of Surprisingly-Cordial Sex Offenders
In late 2006, a money grubbing O.J. Simpson published a book entitled If I Did It, a totally hypothetical discussion of how O.J. would have killed his wife and Ronald Goldman. This book caused a firestorm of bad press and was tragically recalled before it reached stores. In O.J.’s memory, I wrote a tribute to him entitled If I Did It, a discussion of how I would have killed those two people. This book was also killed before reaching the shelves, but that might have had more to do with my poor penmanship and general aversion to personal hygiene. But seeing as O.J. is about to go to prison for the next ten years, I though it an appropriate time to pimp my forgotten masterpiece. |
Entries feed:
Comments feed:
|
|||||||||||||
Copyright © 2012 Clunkline - All Rights Reserved Powered by WordPress & the Atahualpa Theme by BytesForAll. Discuss on our WP Forum 202 queries. 0.562 seconds. View in: Mobile | Standard
|
||||||||||||||
