Excuse me, could I perhaps have a minute of your time? You see, I had a bit of an accident, and now I appear to be– well, I guess you can already see for yourself. Anyway, I was wondering if you could maybe… oh, of course, I see you are on the phone, I didn’t mean to interrupt anything. I can just wait until you’re finished… oh, it’s going to be a while, is it? In that case, sorry to have bothered you, I will let you carry on.
…
Um, excuse me, sir? Sir? Terribly sorry sir, but as you can see I’ve gotten myself into a bit of a… conflagration, if you will. And– oh dear, it appears to be spreading. Well, there goes my ability to reproduce. Anyway, I was wondering, if it wouldn’t be any inconvenience, if perhaps you could take a few moments to assist me… right, I can see that you are in a hurry, but at your suggestion I will try inside this sandwich shop here. Thank you very much, I don’t mean to keep you any longer.
…
Yes, hello, I– oh, terribly sorry, I appear to have tracked a small amount of mud into your delicatessen, I assure you I will clean it myself, however, I have a slightly more pressing issue to attend to at the moment. I see you have a fire extinguisher on that wall there. If it would not be too much trouble, I don’t suppose you could… yes, I suppose the fire extinguisher would be for paying customers only, wouldn’t it? Well, in that case, I will have a large… no make that a small, black forest ham. And to drink? Hmmmm, I’ll have a ginger ale, I suppose. You don’t have that? Okay, um, well, what are your options? I see… I see… you know what? Orange soda sounds nice, I’ll have that. And let me just get my wallet out, and… oh my, it appears that most of my cash has been burned already. Would you accept part of a ten dollar bill? Most of it is still intact. Ah, I see you have an “unburned cash only” policy. Well, thank you for your time, I suppose I’ll try next door.
