Fesus Christ

As the result of an alleged miracle, the likeness of Jesus Christ has been found in a pile of dog feces in the heart of the Vatican.

According to the Holy See, a stray dog wandered into the Basilica of St. John Lateran sometime last Thursday. The dog apparently then managed to get into a storeroom filled with communion wafers, upon which it gorged itself.

The next morning during mass, a pile of the dog’s feces was discovered under one of the pews.

But this is no ordinary mound of feces, Pope Benedict XVI claims. His Holiness says the image of Jesus is clearly evident within it, and the halo, a faint ring of light yellow-brown feces, is also quite visible.

The following day, church officials held a mass and vigil dedicated to the feces, which Pope Benedict dubbed Fesus Christ. Donations toward a permanent display enclosure for Fesus Christ are currently being accepted by the Vatican.

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