Hello friends and welcome back to another edition of the Cookbook series. This time, we have some springtime and end-of-school favorites sure to get you cooking.
Nom de Pomme’s Equinox Eggs
Ingredients:
3 eggs
1 gyroscope
At the precise moment when the Earth’s equator is perpendicular to the rays of the sun, balance the three eggs on end on your countertop. At the same time, put the gyroscope into a mixing bowl, and use it to smash the eggs. Consume raw. For additional fun, don’t do this at all.
Semester End Great-Escape Burgers
Ingredients:
1 fast car with a full tank of gas
1 cheeseburger
When you step up to get your diploma for a year of living in a hellish place with no soul that you intend to never ever come back to in your entire life as well as deny that you ever set foot there, take the cheeseburger and smash it in the face to the elitist head administrator whose reckless disregard for proper allocation of funds has lead to a falling apart campus and universal discontent. At the same time, bid farewell to the entire assembly, then jump in your car and with all your might stand on the accelerator til you are halfway home doing 180 and being chased by two states’ worth of law enforcement. Don’t stop til you run out of gas.
