*Shoelaces untie themselves. Headphone cords tie themselves. Even if you notice this and start tying your shoes with headphones, you won’t get what you want.
*If you cut off your finger, it won’t grow back. If you cut off a hairy, disgusting mole, it’ll grow back.
*Over the course of a man’s life, he will lose hair on his head, and gain hair in his nose, on his nipples, and in his asscrack.
*Put food in a baby’s mouth, it’ll dribble down their face. Try to keep anything inedible out of a baby’s mouth… well… good luck.
Yeah… God exists, He’s just an asshole.
