Cairo – After the successful ousting of their president, the Egyptian protesters have moved as one across the world demanding that persons of authority give up their posts and leave in exile. Starting nobly in Saudi Arabia by getting King Abdulla to pull a Nicholas the Second, they eventually made their way through Eastern Europe, uninstalling any democratically elected prime minister, provincial governor, or small town mayor that was unlucky enough to cross paths with the mob. Stopping in Moscow for a rest, the mob then demanded Store #876679 Manager Mikail Zebnov relinquish his “czarist grip on the workers of this great restaurant”. Reports indicate that restaurant’s management has been filled by a council of security guards who will work rapidly to revamp their mission statement and suspend the suggestion box.
The crowd then slowly migrated further east, coming upon a pack of timber wolves in the depths of the Eurasian steppes. One protester noted “For too long, Ragnar the wolf has led this pack as alpha male with a tyrannical nipping of the neck. No longer!” Despite the -15 F temperatures and wolf attacks, the he-wolf eventually left his position of power and became beta.
The mob was last seen shouting at a flock of migrating geese to have the one at the front of the flying-V go to the back and have the rest elect somegoose else to lead them.