This past weekend, I attempted to get back in touch with a high school classmate of mine. I noticed that next to his mugshot on the sex offender database, there were no ads. Nothing, anywhere on the page. I was more outraged by this omission than by the crime he “allegedly” committed.
No marketing opportunity should go to waste! So, I hired a polling firm and did the field work to determine what ads would see a lot of traffic there. Here are my recommendations about what to advertise to readers of sex offender databases.
White vans
The always-in-style shaggin’ wagon is inexplicably popular with this demographic. The white paint job symbolizes innocence; the tinted windows, its loss. |
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Dec. 15, 2009, 23:20 by Grabass_Champion, Burpen, Tanzmetall, nom de pomme, Hedge, FooTay, farkle-farkle, hangtthedj, Senator Bongledongle
Since Clunkline has just entered its new glorious auspicious second phase of righteous harmony, known to non-party-members as Clunkline 2.0, we as the Clunkline staff feel it’s necessary at this juncture to issue a review of the past two years of Clunkline history.
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Dec. 12, 2009, 1:25 by hangtthedj, Burpen, TanzmetallBecause we’re too classy to make a joke about PenisDot, we decided to compare Pennsylvania’s infrastructure to a nice, wet heap of dogshit.
 Yeah, right. Where are you gonna see a road that nice in Pennsylvania? |
 That's more like it. |
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Appropriate:
Ireland: A land full of angry people.
Export: So named because you should leave.
Normalville: As lame as it sounds.
Blueballs: A letdown.
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