The Clunkline Clunks Its Last

As acting grand poobah of Clunkline I hereby call that the last clunk has been clunked. Thank you readers for your support and writers for your content. Thanks for the laughter and thanks for the memories.

Clint Eastwood said it best

Some times, there are just people who you know are going to do some things or be there, and when destiny calls, maybe someone will pick up the phone. …I’m sorry, Barack Obama, but I don’t even much like farm animals, especially donkeys, I don’t know why you’d suggest that I kiss one. You’re so crazy, Barack Obama.
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Tanzmetall Institute of Technology and Such

Recently Clunkline reporter nom de pomme sat down with Tanzmetall who has established an institution of higher education at his new bunker-house in Los Angeles, CA.

Nom de pomme: So tell me about your new project.

Tanzmetal: Well I have set up my guest room as a University. Degree mill & everything.

NDP: Would I be able to pay an unreasonable fee to attend your institution of higher learning?

T: It would be so incredibly unreasonable.

NDP: Interesting…

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Cheeseburgers Invade China, Kill All Butts

CHINA

Cheeseburgers have invaded, ruthlessly killing all butts in the area. Not a single butt is left alive as of press time. People are starting to wonder how they will go poo now that they have eaten all the cheeseburgers, which were apparently just as delicious as non-murderous sandwiches.

Also, a number of cows have been set free in the streets of Beijing, perhaps a hundred thousand head or more. They also lack butts and might explode if they keep eating grass.

Kill Death 4: Capital Gunishment by Norm D. Apple

Exterior, coastal fortress in Bolivia, twilight. Guards dressed in plain clothes patrol along the high walkways and exterior walls of the old Spanish fort. Inside, there are tarps covering cargo platforms, jeeps with machine guns moving about, and a few well-dressed men discussing something on the balcony of a luxurious manor home. Some of the soldiers are opening boxes marked EXPLOSIVE AMMUNITION and distributing the contents.

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