My favorite part of the Muffin Wars was when Muffin Darth Vader said to Muffin Luke Skywalker, “You’re muffin without me!” and Luke replied, “That part of my past is dead and blueberried. You’re a nut, the banana of my existence!” And then the fleet of alien bagels began to invade and they had to work together to rescue MDV’s daughter from an office building like in Muffin Die Hard.

[CURTAIN RISES. CLOUD CITY SCAFFOLDING. EXTERIOR.]

Inigo (clutching sword): My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.

Lord Vader (clutching a lightsaber): No, Inigo. I AM your father.

Inigo: NOOOOOOOO~! Noooo-oh-oh-oh! It’s not true! It’s not – Okay, I guess I can kind of see what you mean.

Lord Vader: Join me and we’ll rule the galaxy as father and son.

Inigo: Okay!

[EXEUNT.]

… [BUT THEN THEY DIDN'T, AND JUST ATE A LOT OF WAFFLES.]

… … [THE EMPEROR DIDN'T GET ANY.]

… … … [DOUBLEEXEUNT.]