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I actually made this years ago, and forgot about it. Before I started on the Plutonium Abs program, I was just a scruffy little weakling, just like you. I was overweight, at 4 foot ten and over 200 pounds, but yet I couldn’t lift as well as girls who only weighed 130. But just look at me now! I’ve grown a foot, lost my belly, all while gaining 400 pounds of pure muscle. I actually use most of the muscle to hold the rest of my muscles up. And can you tell I weigh 600 pounds? No! I look great, because I’m roughly as dense as freshly-milled steel.
Underground Man said, “Don’t put entrails in the cup.” Apparently he prefers his offal jokes to be tasteful. So you can blame him that there are no delicious delicious entrails floating in milk broth.
Simple!It takes the air around it and gives it a strong ironic charge. These charged particles affect the world around them, resulting in extraordinary events of a strong ironic tone. See it in action! Hey, you out there, I’m willing to make a bet about you. I bet you’re one of those people who really likes a good nog. I bet you like to sit down next to the fireplace, recline, and enjoy a good thick glass of nog. I bet you wish one or both of your nipples made the stuff around this time of year so you could have it everywhere you go! I bet you totally hate it when people spell the name “Jeff” “Geoff”! Once again, I’m correct. But that’s not what I’m here to talk to you about. SOooooo……….. So what if it’s really nothing more than a real ad for Pepto-Bismol?
“Negro Bits” didn’t make it through the marketing people.
I’ll have a cup of that nude chick! There used to be a time when we had standards. Things used to come from places we could trust, where underpaid workers on our own soil would produce products that we didn’t have to fear, so long as it didn’t come from the meatpacking industry. It’s not like that anymore. Products come from overseas where quality control is not really of key interest. After all, it’s expensive. Evidently now the soft drink industry understands our quality concerns and has decided to proudly tell us this: |
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