Night Shift Collages: Coffeehouse Edition

Inspired by the memory of compiling the original Night Shift Collages and the Scissorshop images with Burpen, I decided to make some of these during time in which I should have been doing useful things in school.

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Steam Wenches Gone Wild

Important Financial Institution of America Cares About You

Win a Free Penis! Enlarge your Laptop!

Poop Tarts

FedEx Pinkos

Illegally Blind

I actually made this years ago, and forgot about it.

Offaltine

Underground Man said, “Don’t put entrails in the cup.” Apparently he prefers his offal jokes to be tasteful.

So you can blame him that there are no delicious delicious entrails floating in milk broth.

Dicked Over

Dear Vianda, LLC Legal Department:

I am writing you to complain about your Enzyte product. Numerous times on your television ad, you claimed that the product would make me bigger and enhance my maleness. Having completed your free thirty day trial, I have not noticed any significant growth. While my partner insists that I look bigger, I maintain that is simply because I have not been trimming my hair this past month. I insist you stop selling your misleading product immediately before I report you for false advertising.

Also, even though after a month of using your product I have not seen an inch added to my 5’9” height, I have noticed that my cock is three inches longer. I suggest you warn about this side effect on your television advertisements.

Sincerely,
M. Kiwi

This Writer Was Non-Talented!

Was “non-challenge” the best expression the person making this ad could think of?

“Easy thing” would even be better than “non-challenge”. How do these people get and keep their jobs?

When is it safe to have sex after childbirth?

What a heinous advertisement! My monocle flew from my eye.

After the child is old enough to enjoy it, you sick fucks.

Numeral Bank

Tired of feeling like just a statistic?
Try Numeral Bank, where we focus on the person!

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It's Mmm-Mmm Good!

Where will you be?

So what if it’s really nothing more than a real ad for Pepto-Bismol?

Fuzzy Memory indeed

Fuzzy Memory is an aptly-named webcomic by two creators who forgot to make it.

These guys apparently made a fully-functional website, bought ads for it, and never added any content. Apparently their Project Wonderful campaign is still running on autopilot, spending their money without their supervision on a site they don’t update.

We just got paid by the laziest people on the planet.